Venting

Mistakes have become so expensive lately, it's like the world's greatest means of revenue - overdraft fees, late fees, break lease fees, HOA VIOLATION FEES!!! Things like this really encourage my cynicism when I am really struggling to be hopeful and certainly more patient with God's plan.

To give you some idea we have had some unfortunate mishaps whether due to our disorganization of time or just plain fraudulent robbery. It's like bumping your head on the same low door frame everyday. My sin nature wants to point the finger and blame blame blame that blasted door frame for existing right where my spacial awareness is blind but that's ridiculous.

We are victim to about $6200+ worth of these insane violations and fraudulent occurrences and it's all happened as we have made the greatest headway to reduce our debt. I admit I am maybe worshiping the day when I can confidently say "I don't owe any money to anyone!" The point at which what comes into our bank goes entirely toward our future and not a penny recovering our mistakes from the past. Is this possible? Is there some deeper lesson to be observed from this constant reality of debt?

I hate unmarked letters for this reason; they make my heart jump into my throat and choke me. This is the money devil isn't it? They say you can't be buried with your money but when you die who gets left with your debt? Yes I am indulging my cynicism now.

2010 Full Force Ahead

It is always amazing to look back and observe the period of waiting both with humiliation and with hindsight and thankfulness for God's blessing.

As many of you know Adam finally found a job just before Christmas which allowed us to enjoy the holidays with a little more peace.

We are also expecting kiddo #3 in June which has also been a challenge to our ability to cope with the longer-than-expected period of unemployment.

Adam begins at UCF next week stepping closer toward his degree in Electrical Engineering. Meanwhile this new job is a super thrill for him working with military defense training and exhausting his skills and aptitude with a group of guys from all military, engineering and technical backgrounds. The job has been a wonderful answer to prayers prayed even 5 years ago when Adam was first entering the civilian career field after his tour with the Navy. We prayed for something relevant and chock full of skill building experience for his degree pursuit. I'm really thrilled for him.

I am slowly and somewhat diligently pursuing a degree less than quarter time right now. Recently I've been more anxious to develop some sort of trade in addition to my first love of Art History. The idea of juggling the schooling with three little ones frightens me, but I've seen God make anything happen over the last ten years and I have faith He will make the time and opportunity available as it pleases Him. I'm considering a degree in Radiology Sciences for the purpose of becoming a technician as my "trade".

I know these years with small kids will go fast. I already experience the rush of their change and maturity. My main goal right now is to keep it together while I'm still learning how to be a parent and to multiple children. Something tells me I'm going to be learning until my kids have kids.

So if you think of me or Adam just pray that we can make a God-glorifying juggle of marriage, survival and parenthood. One day at a time has never been more real to me. The process of sanctification is abrupt at times and a relief to my worldview in respect to the many circumstances in this life which are entirely out of my hands.

Letting God be God.